“Anyone But You” star Sydney Sweeney hosted “SNL” this weekend and fell hard for an allegedly straight Bowen Yang in the process. In a video sketch, Sweeney confides in cast members Heidi Gardner and Ego Nwodim about her crush on Yang, but gets assured that Yang is as straight as they come. Unfortunately, that doesn’t stop him for being toxic. In the end, a devastated Sweeney laments to Gardner, “I got played.”
The sketch begins with Sweeney, Gardner and Nwodim seated at a table backstage in the 30 Rock offices. The “White Lotus” actress says she has an “itsy bitsy crush” on someone in the show’s cast. After she reveals her crush is on Yang, the pair encourages her to ask him out. A confused Sweeney asks, “Isn’t he… gay?”
“Gay?” Nwodim says. “He’s straight.” Gardner echoes, “Yeah, straight as they come. Bowen just plays gay on the show because it’s a shortcut to laughs.”
After being assured that Yang hooks up with “hot girls” by Nwodim, Sweeney begins her pursuit, encouraged after she sees Yang kissing actress Gina Gershon in a surprise cameo. After Yang passes her in the hallway and asks, “Hey baby girl, where’s my smile?” she hurriedly says, “Bowen, I didn’t know you were straight.”
“Oh yeah,” Yang intones. “I’m full hetero.” He tells Sweeney that his type is “blonde, smart” with “heavy naturals” — an apparent reference to the actress’s famously prominent chest, which was a focus throughout her episode hosting. The actress says her type is “gay-presenting Asian podcasters,” which appeared to make the two a perfect match.
The two quickly hook up, after which Sweeney sits up to find Yang busy playing a video game. After a quick back and forth, he hurriedly leaves the room and says he’s going to Paris, leaving a confused Sweeney behind.
Days later, Sweeney and Gardner spot Yang across the street with two women as they speak French and head into a waiting helicopter. A disappointed Sweeney says, “I got played by Bowen Yang,” to which Gardner replies, “Welcome to the club, mama.”
“Why didn’t you warn me about him?” Sweeney asks.
“Some lessons you’ve got to learn for yourself,” Gardner concludes.
Watch the sketch in the video above.
