“Late Night” host Seth Meyers joked in his return Monday night that he somehow managed to “miss an entire White House press secretary” in his one-week break from broadcasting.
“Well, we were only on hiatus for one week, and we missed an entire White House press secretary,” he joked, referencing Katie Zacharia’s extremely brief tenure in the Trump Administration. “Five days. That’s how long she lasted. She got hired, gave one press briefing and then got fired so fast the melon in her welcome-aboard edible arrangement was still safe to eat.”
“She got fired so fast I can barely remember her name. I think it was, um, Kaley Macarena? Kareed Zakaria? Casey’s Sack-of-Potatoes? I don’t know. I feel like I’m close,” Meyers continued. “I don’t even remember where she came from or how she got the job. All I know is that, judging from her first and only briefing, her previous gig was Crew Member on ‘Below Deck.’”
The comedian went on to note that the only thing he knows about Zacharia is that she is “maybe” a lawyer. Referencing the former White House press secretary’s widely disputed professional claims, Meyers questioned why she even said she was a lawyer in the first place.
“You don’t even have to be a lawyer to be the press secretary!” he noted. “But she said she was, and they believed her. Nobody checked, because apparently they vet new employees less intensely than a record store.”
Meyers later observed that Zacharia was not the only person who experienced an “unceremonious departure from Trump world” last week. Former U.S. Ambassador to Greece Kimberly Guilfoyle was also fired last week amid reports of corruption and pay-to-play schemes.
“Do you know how much corruption you have to be doing for it to be too much corruption for Donald Trump?” the NBC host mused. He was subsequently delighted to learn that Guilfoyle’s firing was announced to the public last week… by Zacharia.
“Oh, my God! What are the odds Guilfoyle got fired during what scientists call the Incredibly Tiny Zacharian Window,” Meyers joked. “Guilfoyle got fired, and then the person who announced her firing also got fired. It’s like a Russian nesting doll, if each doll was being escorted out by security.”
