A new honest trailer for Legendary’s “Godzilla” takes the King of Monsters to task for only making a cameo in his own movie.
According to Screen Junkies’ calculations for their latest movie preview parody (above), director Gareth Edwards only gave the big guy 11 minutes and 16 seconds of screen time.
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“Get ready for the tease of the summer, bringing you the king of the monsters like you’ve never seen him before: Obscured by water, hidden in smoke, barely visible through masks, shot from really long distances on television, and shrouded in near-constant darkness,” the narrator says. “In a movie called ‘Godzilla,’ spend 80 percent of the run time with two monsters nobody has ever heard of.”
Perhaps what disappointed some viewers even more is that “Breaking Bad” star Bryan Cranston was killed off early on in the blockbuster. Meanwhile, the rest of characters were pretty boring with very little impact on the movie’s arc, which TheWrap‘s chief film critic, Alonso Duralde, summed up as “waiting for Godzilla.”
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“Instead of watching the title character kick ass, spend hours of screen time with ‘Kick-Ass’ and the rest of his boring family,” the Honest Trailer narrator continues. “Kick-Ass’s wife, an emergency room nurse who reacts to a crisis by abandoning her patients and pawning off her only child on a co-worker.”
Let’s not forget one of the biggest flaws the film had to offer: Aaron Taylor-Johnson‘s good-for-nothing character.
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“He’s a professional bomb disposal expert who never defuses any bombs, is a magnet for every single giant monster, an A-hole who keeps volunteering for dangerous missions instead of coming home for his wife and kids, and a hero who spends more time and effort saving this random boy you met on a train than he does trying to save his own family,” the narrator adds.
Yeah, that about sums it up.