Stephen Colbert returned Monday night to celebrate the United States’ gold medal wins at the Winter Olympics last week, including Team USA’s overtime victory over Team Canada in the men’s hockey division.
“In your polite face, Canada! We beat you at hockey. That’s your whole thing!” Colbert joked during his Monday night monologue. “That’d be like you beating us at squandering our international goodwill.” The “Late Show with Stephen Colbert” host also shouted out U.S. figure skater Alysa Liu, who became the first American to win an individual gold medal in figure skating since 2002.
“The women’s hockey team also crushed Canada in overtime and and, in figure skating, the most joyful person we’ve ever seen, Alysa Liu, rocketed to gold with a jaw-dropping program,” Colbert recapped, before rolling a clip of Liu joyfully exclaiming “that’s what I’m f—king talking about” just moments after her gold medal-winning program.
“Yeah! That’s what we’re all f—king talking about! Come on!” Colbert said, while pumping his fist. “I am *this* close to dyeing stripes in my hair and getting whatever that gum piercing is — unless it hurts, in which case just the stripes.” You can watch the full “Late Show” segment yourself below.
In the back half of his Monday monologue, Colbert pivoted away from America’s Winter Olympics victories this year. “That wasn’t the only victory for America,” Colbert added, after discussing Liu’s figure skating win. “On Friday, the Supreme Court struck down Donald Trump’s tariffs. Now that’s what I’m talking about.”
In response to loud cheers from his studio audience, Colbert announced, “Justices, you’ve done something truly historic: You’ve made people go ‘woo-hoo!’ about tariffs.” Afterward, the comedian noted that President Trump was “not thrilled with the court’s decision” before lampooning the president’s Truth Social post about it, which Colbert joked was “longer than the Unabomber’s user agreement.”
“In his screed, Trump went after the majority justices, calling them ‘fools and lapdogs for the RINOS and Radical Left Democrats’ who have been swayed by ‘foreign interests,’” Colbert said. “Yes, and Trump has been very clear. He will not be swayed by foreign interests — only by foreign golden plane, foreign golden crown and foreign golden FIFA peace prize.”
